But sometimes things that look screwball actually end up being absolutely genius, and "strategies" people recommend as ironclad and practical end up going, well... south.
Time tells the story in the end. And authenticity and respect for others usually goes farther than anything else.
Guy McLaren
· 1 year ago
Number one and three nearly destroyed me. But The good thing is I have learned to think before engaging
AD PR NYC
· 1 year ago
Your observation about the obsessively negative commenters is right on the money.
Just imagine the private hell and constant insecurity they must feel to just make a life out of rudeness.
If it is not constructive criticism - just delete the comment. They will go away and find another victim eventually ;-)
Brent Harrison
· 1 year ago
Thought provoking post . . . made me think about some of my experiences.
I find Being Overly Careful With Everything I Say Online is the trickiest. My general orientation has been not to say anything online that I wouldn't say to someone in person. (Sometimes that makes me soften more incendiary comments online; other times it makes me bolder and more in-your-face in person).
Guy Kawasaki coached me recently on a blog post where he felt I was "bragging" about some project I did for a client unnecessarily. When I wrote the original post, I was sincerely trying to represent my sincere enthusiasm for the work - was too close to it to see it otherwise.
Given this experience, I would suggest another related to Assume Social Media Didn't Exist Before Your Arrived, which would be Listen to Coaching of Those More Experienced. This is especially true if unsolicited - in Guy's case he was graciously trying to help me (without requesting anything in return - though I bet he'll pitch me a book soon!) You always have the option to thank the person and not follow the advice.
Another one related would be (not to) monitor a new social network prior to jumping in. Context is important. I've learned from other experts in the field simply by following their lead on Twitter and reading blogs. No need to copy but understanding each person's tone, style and unwritten protocol of the social network can be intuited just by signing up and reading for awhile before jumping in actively.
One final one I would add would be Don't Feel the Need to Get the Last Word in. My wife recently dealt with a disgruntled customer at the wine bar & wine shop we own. After much apologizing in person, on the phone and one line, we thought the customer was satisfied. Then came the 1-star Yelp review months later where she, among other things, attacked our integrity. I responded directly with what I thought was a very dispassionate and apologetic tone. It was like pouring gasoline on the flames. She felt my note was demeaning and hostile. I pondered responding but chose to ignore. Some risk in this, of course, but my experience tells me that some people will never let you have the last word (and some will never be satisfied). Most will tire of flaming if not responded to. Use this one judiciously.
dcholloway
· 1 year ago
Thanks for the post. Agree with everything except, "Post a comment on your own Facebook profile wall."
The issue here is that wall posts form an important part of the conversation happening in facebook. Wall posts can appear fragmented and disconnected to people who aren't following the conversation on both ends. And this detracts from the value of wall posts and adds to the amount of noise within one's profile. They're (wall posts) static pieces of information that get easily lost and can't really be expanded upon.
To remedy this, frequently I'll "reply" to wall posts on my profile to provide clarification about certain posts, in addition to a number of other things.
I've also openly requested that facebook add the comment feature to wall posts, just like they have enabled for virtually every other piece of information that comes through the news feed. This will be a very useful development, IMO.
OK, admittedly I might sound like one of these facebook marketing noobs, but the truth is that I''ve used facebook almost since its inception and am comfortable with my social network faux pas. I'm almost certain that not too long in the distant future facebook will enable the comment feature for wall posts, too, so that part of the conversation will become more meaningful and valuable than just a random, static blurb here and there. It really needs to be dynamic to be meaningful.
Anyway, just my $.02
dcholloway
Melanie
· 1 year ago
That's what "Wall to Wall" is for. Someone posts on your wall, and you post back on their wall, and you can read the entire exchange by clicking "Wall to Wall."
Kitsune
· 1 year ago
But if you want someone else to follow along with your witty banter (and let's be honest -- that's why you're doing it, since otherwise, it would be a private message exchange) they cannot read what you said on the other person's wall unless they are friends with both of you.
dcholloway
· 1 year ago
Exactly.
And to add to that, others are left out of the conversation. "Wall to Wall" is a public conversation (if people can see the other person's wall, as Kitsune pointed out), but only two people can engage in the conversation at a time. If someone has something to add to the conversation, they can only further fragment the dialogue by making a disconnected wall post that doesn't show up in the "Wall to Wall" conversation, and may leave observers to the conversation confused.
Kitsune
· 1 year ago
Not to sound like a flame-enticer, but it would be nice if you kept the same format for all your bullet points. Some are phrased as what the mistake is and some are phrased as what you shouldn't do.
"Don’t come to your own defense when people bad mouth you online... Accept friend requests from people you barely know..."
It seems like you're advocating accepting the requests, since the first one is taken at face value.
Jason
· 1 year ago
Thanks for the excellent post.
Just a comment on the voice talent item: I completely agree.
There is certainly a wide need for voice talent, but I am consistently amazed at the results a non-professional can get with a decent podcasting kit. I have a Samson SAC01UPK Recording And Podcasting Kit. It has a USB mike, a tabletop stand, and some useful software.
If you buy a pop/sibilance filter and play around for a few minutes with a software-based audio editor (even a freebie like audacity) to get rid of the sighs and swallows, you can really get outstanding results for under 200 bucks.
I started using this type of setup to do temporary voice-over for elearning so we could test before the voice talent came in. Well, we ended up never using the voice talent.
I've loaned this kit out a few times, and everyone is shocked at how good they sound with a little practice.
Last thing -- if your words are being read, think about a DIY approach. You naturally know where your inflection needs to be and where to hit points of emphasis. These benefits go a long way to creating a connection with your listener, at least in my opinion.
Adrianne Machina
· 1 year ago
Even the pros of Social Media sometimes seem too "happy" - perhaps it's an addendum to your "being overly careful about what you say online" but sometimes too much good news just makes you look naive or like a spin-meister. Social media requires being authentic.
Social media gurus can also become become too clique-y online...Yes, we all have friends and favorite pals, but we also need to take care to extend our reach to new people who may become raving fans of our products or services.
Adrianne Machina
Jason
· 1 year ago
P.S. That pic of Mookie Wilson and Buckner never gets old!
Marc Meyer
· 1 year ago
Adrianne, good point I notice some of the a-listers spend more time patting each other on the back and enagaging in witty dbl entendres with their peeps than they do sharing their knowledge and expertise-not that they're required to but still...
Here was my mistake as a community manager. I banned someone whose whole life was the community. Thinking that would be the end of it. I moved on. It was far from it. That person took it upon themselves to try and blow up (figuratively) every aspect of social media, myself, our brand, and my company was associated with. I had to "let" the person back in because it was easier to manage them under my watch. Big Lesson learned about the power of the community and the need to understand the players and not resort to knee jerk power trips.
Stephanie
· 1 year ago
ooh pick me for your 2,000 dollar podcast voiceover! I can do alot of different accents as well. Chinese, Australian , British, Italian, Alaskan, Cambodian, Russian, Jamaican, whatever audience you want to connect to..I got it!
I like this post. My biggest mistake was accidentally sending a tweet through the wrong twitter account. We can laugh about it now.
Captain Obvious
· 1 year ago
The biggest mistake made by social media gurus is pretending that they are what they say they are.
Bostonita
· 1 year ago
Couldn't agree more with Brogan's comment that, "wherever you go on the Web realize there’s been a history. Don’t assume you know everything and discredit what’s been done before you arrived."
It's a mistake that's made over and over and over again. That's why you should always lean on social media specialists to clue you in to the existing culture.
Charles
· 1 year ago
I am a guy who met Alsop at an industry conference and spoke to him briefly about a business venture. I said I would followup after the conference. Afterwards I found him on Facebook and sent him a friend request with a message referring to the conversation. He sent a rude rejection.
Now after your reading your article I see what kind of business he tries to do on Facebook. If I were his kids I'd be embarrassed.
Colin Robertson
· 1 year ago
I don't even know the guy and I'm embarressed for him! Being 50 is no excuse to be creepy.
Kenny
· 1 year ago
The Facebook fallout is starting to happen. Happy times ahead for those of us not on Facebook, we can laugh at those who are.
Eric Doyle
· 1 year ago
I saw a "tweet pitch" today for Mashable, a start-up nearly begging for coverage. it said, "...please don't ignore my email..." Couple mistakes here: 1) unnecessary plea -- just make your case for a story; it actually works AGAINST the start-up's chances of getting coverage on Mashable by sounding desperate and even annoying; 2) not a good way to build relationships; 3) no need to pitch in the public timeline. Send a direct message instead. Pitches need to be customized to individual people, not blasted to the world without real substance.
Laura
· 1 year ago
I like this post a lot. It goes to show that nobody is perfect - not even the experts. It's pretty funny too.
toncmi
· 1 year ago
I like this post a lot too.
georgia
· 1 year ago
I stumbled on this and gave it the thumbs up! Your article is well written and gave me food for thought. I particularly found this funny "Post a comment on your own Facebook profile wall" LOL.
I love stuff like this :) Excellent work.
Borat
· 1 year ago
David Spark is very full of himself. Nevertheless, the fact that he's writing for Mashable with other kids shows that he's a complete sellout
Katie Van Domelen
· 1 year ago
I run the Twitter account for my agency (@SitewireAgency) so I thought to make things easy I'd set up my Twhirl to run both my personal account (@ktvan) as well as the corporate one. One day when I was leaving for lunch I decided to Twitter out a joke about where I was going - except I accidently did it on the company account. I quickly fixed it - but I think anyone who was following us with a desktop app like Twhirl probably saw it.
Danny Brown
· 1 year ago
Great list there.
Also, don't assume that you have less important knowledge to impart compared to the "rock stars" - sometimes the best comments and ideas/blog posts I've read have been written by everyday Joe's. We all start somewhere :)
ron o
· 1 year ago
Dont make bots that make some kind of "friendconnect" to every new user ' Dont pretent to be a hot chick making friend connections with new users.
Why is this happen so often? Have they read it is an good strategy to keep new users? Give them impression that a hot chick want to be their friend or that a startup manager really is your "fan" five minutes after you have connected to their site the first time? My opinion follow O Reilly: Dont underrate your users. Dont assume they are super nerds without brains.
Michelle / chelpixie
· 1 year ago
I strongly consider everything I post anywhere before I hit the button to send or submit because those aren't words I can take back. They are forever in google. I got that down pretty well, very quickly.
The one thing I really dislike is being followed on any service where a man is begging women to follow them. This morning on Twitter someone specifically wanted me to follow them because I was "beautiful", this person is nothing but an icon to me. I've never interacted with him before.
That said, think about what you say to a perfect stranger before you say it and get to know people before making demands. Give before you ask.
Fourclothed
· 1 year ago
I wonder how amused Stewart Alsop will be when he finds out one of the cute girls was an identity thief. That'll be good for next year's social media foobar blog post. :) Assuming "social media" will still be a topic of discussion then.
Brent Harrison
· 1 year ago
Interesting related higher level research about the perils of ignoring online communities: http://tinyurl.com/5peaov
FMC
· 1 year ago
So is it Ok to stalk men?
Allah Akbar!
· 1 year ago
Stop trying to impose your Jew values on us, pig
Web Design Company
· 1 year ago
So many people create profile on leading social networking sites but a vast majority of them never bother to update it. There is nothing worse than a profile or blog that has not been updated for months. Whats the point?
trisha
· 11 months ago
I retweeted this! I think its a great article
trisha
Elizabeth
· 11 months ago
Thank you so much for this post. New to social media this helps tremendously. I especially like the point about not getting worked up over negative comments. You can't please everyone at all times, trying to can take up all of your time.
Thanks again for sharing your knowledge!
~Elizabeth
Blog Shot
· 10 months ago
The Facebook stalking worked for me too. I asked attractive women who shared a birthday with me to be my friend. The result was a 95% acceptance rate. Same, same with people with the same surname.
dougmcisaac
· 7 months ago
I enjoyed your list, my biggest mistake/issue is over editing, I struggle with it and while I develop online and social marketing strategies for clients every day, I struggle sharing my ideas online. I find that commenting and using Twitter is helping me get over it.
Doug
blogomomma
· 7 months ago
Great article, even for the un media. As an outsider, I have no clue who Stewart Alsop is but is it VERY creepy to stalk anyone. Sorry!
Jason
· 7 months ago
I was playing a silly game of trying to be "first" on a popular Facebook fan page. Since you have to post your comment as soon as the link appears on your home feed I didn't have time to read the story and ended up making light of a very tragic international news story. The next several posters after me started flaming me and I had to delete my comment and slink away sadly.
Lesson learned, playing "first" is risky; especially if you don't read the headline!
All Comments
But sometimes things that look screwball actually end up being absolutely genius, and "strategies" people recommend as ironclad and practical end up going, well... south.
Time tells the story in the end. And authenticity and respect for others usually goes farther than anything else.
Just imagine the private hell and constant insecurity they must feel to just make a life out of rudeness.
If it is not constructive criticism - just delete the comment. They will go away and find another victim eventually ;-)
I find Being Overly Careful With Everything I Say Online is the trickiest. My general orientation has been not to say anything online that I wouldn't say to someone in person. (Sometimes that makes me soften more incendiary comments online; other times it makes me bolder and more in-your-face in person).
Guy Kawasaki coached me recently on a blog post where he felt I was "bragging" about some project I did for a client unnecessarily. When I wrote the original post, I was sincerely trying to represent my sincere enthusiasm for the work - was too close to it to see it otherwise.
Given this experience, I would suggest another related to Assume Social Media Didn't Exist Before Your Arrived, which would be Listen to Coaching of Those More Experienced. This is especially true if unsolicited - in Guy's case he was graciously trying to help me (without requesting anything in return - though I bet he'll pitch me a book soon!) You always have the option to thank the person and not follow the advice.
Another one related would be (not to) monitor a new social network prior to jumping in. Context is important. I've learned from other experts in the field simply by following their lead on Twitter and reading blogs. No need to copy but understanding each person's tone, style and unwritten protocol of the social network can be intuited just by signing up and reading for awhile before jumping in actively.
One final one I would add would be Don't Feel the Need to Get the Last Word in. My wife recently dealt with a disgruntled customer at the wine bar & wine shop we own. After much apologizing in person, on the phone and one line, we thought the customer was satisfied. Then came the 1-star Yelp review months later where she, among other things, attacked our integrity. I responded directly with what I thought was a very dispassionate and apologetic tone. It was like pouring gasoline on the flames. She felt my note was demeaning and hostile. I pondered responding but chose to ignore. Some risk in this, of course, but my experience tells me that some people will never let you have the last word (and some will never be satisfied). Most will tire of flaming if not responded to. Use this one judiciously.
The issue here is that wall posts form an important part of the conversation happening in facebook. Wall posts can appear fragmented and disconnected to people who aren't following the conversation on both ends. And this detracts from the value of wall posts and adds to the amount of noise within one's profile. They're (wall posts) static pieces of information that get easily lost and can't really be expanded upon.
To remedy this, frequently I'll "reply" to wall posts on my profile to provide clarification about certain posts, in addition to a number of other things.
I've also openly requested that facebook add the comment feature to wall posts, just like they have enabled for virtually every other piece of information that comes through the news feed. This will be a very useful development, IMO.
OK, admittedly I might sound like one of these facebook marketing noobs, but the truth is that I''ve used facebook almost since its inception and am comfortable with my social network faux pas. I'm almost certain that not too long in the distant future facebook will enable the comment feature for wall posts, too, so that part of the conversation will become more meaningful and valuable than just a random, static blurb here and there. It really needs to be dynamic to be meaningful.
Anyway, just my $.02
dcholloway
And to add to that, others are left out of the conversation. "Wall to Wall" is a public conversation (if people can see the other person's wall, as Kitsune pointed out), but only two people can engage in the conversation at a time. If someone has something to add to the conversation, they can only further fragment the dialogue by making a disconnected wall post that doesn't show up in the "Wall to Wall" conversation, and may leave observers to the conversation confused.
"Don’t come to your own defense when people bad mouth you online...
Accept friend requests from people you barely know..."
It seems like you're advocating accepting the requests, since the first one is taken at face value.
Just a comment on the voice talent item: I completely agree.
There is certainly a wide need for voice talent, but I am consistently amazed at the results a non-professional can get with a decent podcasting kit. I have a Samson SAC01UPK Recording And Podcasting Kit. It has a USB mike, a tabletop stand, and some useful software.
If you buy a pop/sibilance filter and play around for a few minutes with a software-based audio editor (even a freebie like audacity) to get rid of the sighs and swallows, you can really get outstanding results for under 200 bucks.
I started using this type of setup to do temporary voice-over for elearning so we could test before the voice talent came in. Well, we ended up never using the voice talent.
I've loaned this kit out a few times, and everyone is shocked at how good they sound with a little practice.
Last thing -- if your words are being read, think about a DIY approach. You naturally know where your inflection needs to be and where to hit points of emphasis. These benefits go a long way to creating a connection with your listener, at least in my opinion.
Social media gurus can also become become too clique-y online...Yes, we all have friends and favorite pals, but we also need to take care to extend our reach to new people who may become raving fans of our products or services.
Adrianne Machina
Here was my mistake as a community manager. I banned someone whose whole life was the community. Thinking that would be the end of it. I moved on. It was far from it. That person took it upon themselves to try and blow up (figuratively) every aspect of social media, myself, our brand, and my company was associated with. I had to "let" the person back in because it was easier to manage them under my watch. Big Lesson learned about the power of the community and the need to understand the players and not resort to knee jerk power trips.
I like this post. My biggest mistake was accidentally sending a tweet through the wrong twitter account. We can laugh about it now.
It's a mistake that's made over and over and over again. That's why you should always lean on social media specialists to clue you in to the existing culture.
Now after your reading your article I see what kind of business he tries to do on Facebook. If I were his kids I'd be embarrassed.
I love stuff like this :) Excellent work.
Also, don't assume that you have less important knowledge to impart compared to the "rock stars" - sometimes the best comments and ideas/blog posts I've read have been written by everyday Joe's. We all start somewhere :)
'
Dont pretent to be a hot chick making friend connections with new users.
Why is this happen so often? Have they read it is an good strategy to keep new users? Give them impression that a hot chick want to be their friend or that a startup manager really is your "fan" five minutes after you have connected to their site the first time? My opinion follow O Reilly: Dont underrate your users. Dont assume they are super nerds without brains.
The one thing I really dislike is being followed on any service where a man is begging women to follow them. This morning on Twitter someone specifically wanted me to follow them because I was "beautiful", this person is nothing but an icon to me. I've never interacted with him before.
That said, think about what you say to a perfect stranger before you say it and get to know people before making demands. Give before you ask.
trisha
especially like the point about not getting worked up over negative comments. You
can't please everyone at all times, trying to can take up all of your time.
Thanks again for sharing your knowledge!
~Elizabeth
stalking worked for
me too. I asked
attractive women who
shared a birthday
with me to be my
friend. The result
was a 95% acceptance
rate. Same, same
with people with the
same surname.
Doug
As an outsider, I have no clue who Stewart Alsop is but is it VERY creepy to stalk anyone.
Sorry!
Lesson learned, playing "first" is risky; especially if you don't read the headline!